By: Neghar On: March 24, 2015 In: Featured Posts, Fitness, Lift, Mindset Comments: 26

This morning, as I was about to hop into the shower, I just so happened to glance in the mirror. I’m not sure why or what drew my attention, but my eyes were drawn to my breasts, and I suddenly noticed something I hadn’t seen before–stretch marks.

Stretch marks aren’t new to me by any means. I have them on my legs, butt, and hips. I’ve had some since I was a teenager and others occurred during my pregnancy 9 years ago.

But these little guys…they caught me by surprise. It’s possible they’ve been around for ages and I had simply never noticed them, but either way, this was the first I’d seen of them. So in an effort to demystify this situation, I figured I should question the person who probably looks at my body even more than I do: my husband.

I walked into John’s office, butt naked, shower cap on my head (I mean, let’s be honest, I don’t often wash my hair) and asked, “Have you seen these before?”

John replied (quite nonchalantly, I might add) that he hadn’t. I said, rather perplexed, that neither had I. And then you know what I did?

I got in the shower and moved on with my life.

Because here’s the deal:

I have stretch marks.

I have cellulite.

I have “imperfections.”

I also have a strong, capable body that boasts a pair each of delts of doom and quadzillas. I can do pull-ups in the double digits and deadlift 2x my bodyweight on command.

I honor my body. I never take movement for granted.

I am a powerful woman whose body is made from (among other things) skin, muscle, and fat–things that can and will sometimes change with the natural flow of life. I’ve weighed 115 pounds (while in USAF basic training), 175 pounds (the day I had my son), 130 pounds (today!) and everywhere in between.

My body changes.

My body has been through 27 hours of childbirth, 2 hours of pushing, and 12 months of breastfeeding.

I have brought a human into this world.

He is compassionate, empathic, loyal, funny, curious and kind. He makes me laugh and gives me a reason to embody strength.

He is proud to have a strong mom, and is actually the one to whom the credit for the “Because Muscles” motto goes to.

My body has a story, and only I get to decide what that story means.

What kind of story will I allow my body to tell? Will it be a sad story, the kind where I feel sorry for myself, nitpicking at every little detail and feeling less than worthy because of a few flaws?

Or is it a powerful story, a story of nurturing, growth, discovery and the multitude of things this body has accomplished over the years?

The only person who gets to tell that story is me.

In the past, I’ve hated my body into hiding. I’ve allowed self-loathing and feelings of unworthiness to dictate my path, and I’ve let shame back me into a dark corner. I’ve striven for perfection and even I’ve been mean to my beautiful body and treated it like it just wasn’t good enough. That didn’t serve me well at all.

That’s not the story I want to tell.

The story I want to tell is far more meaningful than that. My story is filled with love, learning, laughter, and tears. My story is powerful and uniquely mine. It’s the story of a mother, a wife, a friend, a veteran, a colleague, and a woman imbued with radiant strength and relentless positivity.

My story is about freedom. Freedom from shaming my form, freedom from hating my body into leanness, freedom from societal constructs of what a woman “should” be. Freedom to be 100%, unapologetically me.

I have stretch marks.

And with that, I will keep moving forward on this beautiful adventure.

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  • Pooky

    This gives me goosebumps! What a beautiful & inspiring message. Neghar, you are the most beautiful person I know just by the words you write. Well, you’re beautiful inside and out. But the power of the written word….WOW! I truly appreciate your stories and the positive message they send. Keep on keepin’ on, Girl! XO

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  • Very nice post ! Everybody does has a story about their body. And such a beautiful quote “My body has a story” ..I really appreciate. This article is inspiring me for everything i do, i just want to stop for a second and want to think what story i had and what will be the story i would love to tell. But wait we can make our self feel beautiful and fit at any time. I have found some good exercises techniques at athleticbodydesigns.com please have a look here too. May be it could inspire you to look beautiful and fit.

  • This is such an inspiring post. This is really true. Only us can choose what story our body tells.

    • So glad you enjoyed it!

  • ‘My body has a story …..’ quote is on point, truthful and inspiring. We all have our own story, so it fits that our bodies are unique and look different. I like the way your have expressed and told your story. The whole blog is straight to the point and brutally honest. Yes, women especially we need to look at and embrace our, not so much imperfections, ,but those parts which are trying to tell us something, trying to tell their story or reminding us not to take our bodies for granted. We need to stop being scared of our bodies and treating them as separate entities to our minds. Our bodies serve us well each and every minute of the day. So your unique and powerful physical blog is what we need.

    I have nominated your for the Liebster Award. Please go to http://bajiequ5.com/2015/07/06/liebster-award/. You are not obligated to get involved. Keep up the great work!

  • Great!

  • Ha, I love this post… I have never thought of it that way. Our body’s are a canvas waiting to painted into a masterpiece. I feel like I should go workout or run now. Thank you for sharing your inspiring words.

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  • This is a great post. Had a lot of the same feelings growing up. It is always good to know others are writing about the same struggles as me.

  • Gina

    Im absolutely loving this post! So motivational and a great way to create positive momentum in your life. Learn, Live and Laugh

    – Gina

  • We all have a story for sure! When it comes to my body I must tell myself this regularly, I have a story. Too many car accidents to mention, 3 separate autoimmune issues and yet I am a strong, and active women over 55, on no prescription medications and I can do twice as much as most woman 1/2 my age and yet there have been times when I look at my body with shame because I don’t look the way society says I “should” forgetting how loyal my body has been for me. My body continues to carry me every place I can ask of it. This is my freedom. And I am grateful for my body everyday! Thanks for the reminder! :)

  • A great post Neghar, always interested to read your posts as you draw so much from your own personal experiences. Very motivating! Lawrence- http://www.fafitsake.com

  • Jennifer Burton Brannon


  • Love this article. True beauty is not about perfection, it is about the individual beauty that each of us have in our own way!

  • Devon

    I love this Neghar. I used to hate my stretch marks on my legs, I wouldn’t wear shorts because of it. I can gladly say that they don’t bother me anymore.

  • Kim Gerard

    So true!

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  • Fiona MacDonald

    Your writing is so beautiful. As I reach 24 weeks pregnancy I’m in constant need to be reminded of what our bodies can do for us every day. Thank you for this.

  • This is pretty empowering and good to now that no matter how much you weight, or how much you can lift…you have to have a positive attitude about your life and your body…otherwise you will be sad.

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  • Grace

    Hi neghar, thank you for sharing :) I love reading your articles that come into my inbox each time – they are always so inspiring and empowering, helps me see things in a different perspective and reminds me to be optimistic about life in general. Thank you for spreading the love far and wide :)

  • Heather O

    What a lovely and inspiring way to turn something around. This made me stop and think about what story I’m telling now and what story I want to tell.

  • Hi Neghar! You’re always an inspiration! I love your honesty. I too rarely wash my hair… :) I too love red wine, and I love that you carry yours around in a mason jar to the movies (from a previous post). I’m a personal trainer and have my own very small blog, and it’s easy to think we should be perfect. But why let perfect get in the way of better. Thanks for your ever inspiring words.

  • Mme Wong

    So much YES!

  • Giselle


  • Rylee

    I love everything about this!